Wow. New York was a fast and furious time warp super fun blur. I did not get to meet with the wonderful Guapola…it was not in the stars. BUT MAGGIE IS COMING TO DENVER IN NOVEMBER AND I WILL HAVE A DRINK WITH HER COME HELL OR HIGH WATER!!!! YAY!!!!!
I noticed that while in New York, I would get stuck trying to post things to my phone while I was there, this process pulling me from the actual live experience I was in, so I ditched my phone and all processes of social media. I decided to be PRESENT and be in the world where I was at the time and I didn’t ‘post’ much about anything. And as of right now I have left my phone at the theater and have not retrieved it. Being unplugged is a beautiful thing.
My daughter lives with some really nice kids, she has a new job, she is going to be an Elf at Macy’s this season on top of it and I hated leaving, I was on meltdown for a few days after. I came home and moved out of ‘new’ place that I spent two weeks in (after house sitting and New York trip was said and done) and I moved in with Boyfriend.
So that happened. My life is fast and furious in a very calm and peaceful way lately.
It was so BAD how things progressed at New Place I Moved Into with Friend. She basically moved out and left me as ‘woman of the house’ (her quote) THAT SHE ANNOUNCED AT A PARTY. Not a phone call or conversation telling me she had found a place, but I found out about this in the kitchen of a party surrounded by neighbors; that she and her husband were separating and she’d found a one bedroom apartment.
NO. WAY. JOSE.
She eventually found a house to rent and offered me a place there, but I was kind of over the drama of her life, her kid’s life, her husband’s life and just wanted out of the entire vicinity. I’ve worked so hard to not live in chaos, and found myself in a hurricane. (Earlier I lived with her brother in law – so I’m all done with this entire family.) I oddly enough though, found myself in the eye of the hurricane. I feel calm and happy and just based my decision on not so much running away, but just NOT DOING THAT ANYMORE. Her kid has so many issues, getting kicked out of two schools in two weeks, the every single morning yelling and crying fights before school, the awkward conversations with Husband wherein he stared at my tits the entire time he’d be talking to me. This is HER battle and HER life and HER disruption…not mine. So it was just very clear to me that I just needed to remove myself from it. Not run, not be upset, no drama…just NO.
Boyfriend offered his house, I moved in with him, still not feeling like I was running and we talked about it and us so much, and I feel so different from how I felt a year ago, I feel so calm and so good about everything. It seems good. We are doing the cleaning business together. It is busy and booming and a little more work comes in each week. This is all good.
All of his friends warn him against me. I don’t give a shit. They are not my friends or my peeps. They treat this; us getting back together, as if I slept with his best friend or something, like I’m evil. No one knows what my year consisted of EXCEPT YOU GUYS. So they can completely go fuck off. It’s annoying at most. He says not to worry about it, he is a grown man and has clearly made his decision. TO CHOOSE ME. So there’s that.
In this last year I have clearly found my peeps. There is one friend of his we are meeting tonight, who is here from out of town whom we are going to see my son’s comedy show with tonight, whom invited us to stay at his hotel suite with him overnight and whom says ‘You guys were awesome, Judy is awesome and I can’t wait to see you two!’
I read a quote recently about having four quarters over 100 pennies any day when it comes to friends, and as I get older I quite agree. Also, anymore, I don’t berate people in my mind who have turned out to not be who I wanted them to be, or whom don’t act how I WANT THEM TOO, or how I think they should. There is no longer any resentment or anger for this. I simply just DON’T GO THERE ANYMORE. If a person no longer works out to be a person in my life, then they simply just aren’t a person in my life, I don’t harbor anything, good or bad, I just don’t put energy into a person who is not a positive, inspiring person to me. They go along their path and I mine. It feels so good.
So I’m going to make another 90 day goal.
I think I mentioned earlier about saving money. I want to be more specific. To have more financial stability. Beginning today…10/29 – so 90 days would be January 27th. cool. I had to google that by the way. http://www.convertunits.com/dates/daysfromnow/90 – hahahahaha.
Here’s to friends, goals and new beginnings!!!!
Beginning with, coming to library to hang out instead of bar where I’d order a beer and a burger. I came here while I wait for Boyfriend who is doing Handyman work for our cleaning biz. I WANT A BEER AND A BURGER, but this discipline thing has done well for me.
I still do my positive reinforcement thingies, I am also changing my diet to go along with that, and I just want to focus on this money issue.
So it has been noted.